Our Paths in this World....

The days dragged into weeks, and then into two years. It was 1978 and she was still seeing Sirius Black even though no progress had been made in bringing him over. Truth be told, Alecto didn’t blame him. She herself had seen things she wish she hadn’t, yet there still had been a pull. She felt herself drawn to it, especially when she was near Rodolphus, but she kept pulling herself back, and she feared it was now noticeable. Just recently, her and Sirius had ended their so called relationship, once again, but Sirius decided to give her another chance by inviting her to the Potter/Evans Wedding, which she had turned down; not wanting to continue is this worthless venture. However, Rodolphus told her to go and make one more attempt. She reluctantly agreed, only because Rabastan said he would go with her, which she thought was odd, but she went along with it regardless. Sirius had taken a great risk in inviting her, so they believed that maybe this could be the chance they had been waiting for to get Sirius to join their ranks. Rabastan was still innocent of any wrong doings in the public's eyes, so his presences may not feel like a threat. Alecto still had not been marked, which she was grateful for. Inside she just wanted to escape like Sirius had done, but she had been to fearful, and she had also given her word to Rabastan; that she would always be by his side. He was her closest friend now, and always had been. Still, she wanted a way out, to be free. She believed in blood-purity without a doubt, but she wasn’t sure if bloodshed was the way. She believed that all the time she had been spending with Sirius, had changed her. She cared for him, she really did, but not enough that she wanted to be with him. Something had to change, one way or the other, and soon.

So here she was, once again pleading with Rodolphus so she wouldn’t have to do this anymore, even though he had already told it was pointless to ask. “Rodolphus just because he loves me and wants me there, does not mean anything. If he was going to, he would have already.” Even Rabastan agreed with her, but she did not mention this. “Don’t you think this has gone on long enough? I don’t want to hurt him, I….” She gasped with air and her eyes bulged. How could she have said that to him? She showed weakness, and the fact that she may actually care for Sirius. “I didn’t mean it like that. I just meant….” It was no use. She sighed and her shoulders slumped down in defeat. The words had been spoken, and there was no taking them back. What was happening to her? She hated been so soft, especially when it concerned Black. She stood there knowing his wrath was not going to be pretty.

The waning light of the candles inside the vast studio cast amorphous shapes all over. Above and lofting on the ceiling, the huge chandelier that hung in the middle of the room resembled an intricate cobweb stretching its veil around the entire place. Even now, as he lounged upon the lush, leather couch, Rodolphus' stout frame came to be monstrously imprinted on the opposite wall. From outside, pervading his solitude through the only window in the room, the waxing light of the moon was his only company. Most of the time, these days, he kept himself to the seclusion of this place; unless when the Lord's summon beckoned him elsewhere. He had tried to find a comfort in the silence, a sort of refugee in the foreign worlds and stories the books in the place had to offer. But nothing could quench the thirst he was ravaged with; insatiable and incontrollable.

As expected, he loathed being bared behind doors. He felt like a feral animal, caged, aching for release. He could almost feel all of his skills and muscles slowly supersede to atrophy. To make matters worse, his anxiety and trepidation had been welling up for the past few months, the expectancy of years of work finally reaping their proper rewards was uncontainable. He could feel it in the air, witness it in the eyes of his victims as they bid farewell to an unforgiving world with the imprint of his face as their last memory, smell it in a fear-laden atmosphere. The end was neigh, and he took pride in being harbinger of the chaos and destruction the world needed. The corruption would be dealt with, for in order to come, havoc most be firstly wrecked.

Even Bellatrix was restless. The scant years of marriage had allowed him to get a finer view of his wife, a deeper understanding. Whimsical and easily irked, Bellatrix had always found a release when they were out in a mission. His wife was second to none when it came to the carrying out of Lord Voldemort’s requests, skills that had duly gained her the proper place in the Inner Circle. Euphoria and ecstasy was a dangerous cocktail to get addicted to, nevertheless, it had been a much needed requital in their marriage. Now, being forced to stay together in the same place had them both at their wit’s end. Fights were as usual as breakfast, their tempers far too big to be bottled and contained in the same room. Rodolphus believed nothing could be worse than his present state.

But things were about to get worse.

As the young girl before him beseeched him to reconsider, he could not help but grow tired of her tirade. Truth was, he was getting exhausted of Alecto's moaning and reproaches. It was an inconvenient side effect of having to work with whimsical individuals. He had found working with women a hazardous thing: they were easily swayed and convinced, especially if the premise of affection had a saying in the matter. Therefore, when Lucius Malfoy first affronted him with the idea of having the younger Carrow to manipulate Sirius Black to their side, he had laughed and mocked, deeming the feat impossible. The young heir to the Always Pure was the epitome of what was wrong with this world. At first, he thought his sense of self-righteousness would hinder him from even considering joining forces with them. Slowly, however, he had been proven wrong. Having sorely underestimated her power on the young boy, Alecto had proved herself to be, indeed, worthy.

"Don't make me repeat myself, Alecto." He scowled at her, eyeing her crossly in the shadows. "You will go. And you will take Rabastan with you. Understood?" He pressed his lips, diverting his attention to the moon, but he is soon reeled back into the conversation the moment she splutters the truth. “What?” He slowly rose, coming to his six feet, three inches of height and obviously towering over her. "You don’t want to hurt him?" A mix of amusement and anger screws up his face, his hand slowly running through her silken hair in a gentle way.

"Alecto, how many times have we been through this? There is no room for hesitations of that kind in you anymore." His fingers reached the bottom, and rose once more to the top, repeating the same previous motion. "The boy is nothing. The moment you hesitate, you are dead." And here he finally pulled her hair, leaning forward so his face hovers above hers by mere inches. "This is the one opportunity you have to prove yourself worthy to the Lord. Are you going to waste it on him? I know you are smarter than that.

When Rodolphus stood up and approached her, she refused to back away, to show fear, a trait she has had with him since she learned the truth about him; but not this day. She stood her ground and she let him stroke her hair. The feeling was soft, but distrusting; she saw it in his eyes as he spoke of her obvious feelings towards Sirius. She nodded her head in acknowledgement still waiting for his true anger to show, for she knew it would, she’d experienced it a few times in the past. Yet his delicate touch to her hair sent awakening sensations through her body and her eyes closed briefly to his touch until she felt the expected hard pull to her hair and she squinted in pain, not letting loose a sound, but instead opened her eyes and stared directly into his eyes, almost challenging. He was only inches away, and she could smell the sweet aroma of liquor on his breath. She could see the fire in his eyes as the moon shined brightly on his face. In a way this turned her on as her breathing deepened, but she still felt fearful and unbalanced by the mixed emotions she was experiencing. She also knew Rodolphus was right, but she couldn’t help how she felt, but she knew she had to do it, or maybe she would just leave it all behind and ask Sirius to help hid her at the wedding. She would never join him or his little do-gooders, but at least if she was out of the equation in a sense, she couldn’t be used to hurt others.

But was that what she really wanted? Could she so easily turn her back on her father, her brother, Rabastan, Rodolphus? Her mother had recently pasted away about a year prior, and the last thing she remembered her mother telling her, was that the life her father and brother were leading, was not the one she wanted for Alecto. Alecto believed that everything had just been to much for her mother and her already weak heart, and in the end, it just gave out. Others had their own opinions on how she died. Ones Alecto refused to believe. Her father was an dedicated Death Eater, but lately he had even dropped hints to her to follow her own path. Not her brother though. He was anxious for the day when she was ready and trained and standing next to him. So had never been so confused in her life.

Although, looking into Rodolphus’ eyes, and seeing her own reflection in them, she sees a different girl, a sinister one; the girl she once was before Sirius Black became a priority in her life. It was like looking into a mirror and seeing another version of herself, a doppelganger. For a moment it seemed to mock her, daring her to show her true colors, the ones buried deep within. She wanted so badly to show herself and him that she was still that girl, but in the end, her fear broke through. “Please Rodo…. I’ll do want you want. Please….your hurting me.” She felt defeated, small, and she felt that one small tear roll down her cheek and her teeth clenched, feeling embarrassed as well. How did she get to this place? She couldn’t even remember the last time she cried; she didn’t even cry at her mothers death, which effected her hard, so why now? She closed her eyes then, not wanting Rodolphus to see the shame. “I don’t know what’s happening to me.” She admitted softly.

With one final tug of her hair, he made sure he had her full attention, a cocktail of alcohol, of anxiety and sheer frustration crossed the deep auburn of his eyes. They both had come this far, and he would not allow a meddlesome teenager to ruin the plans he had so carefully devised. The woman that was before him, he knew, could never be someone else's. He had to made sure of it, and he was willingly enough to leave some mark, some dent on her to prevent any other man from touching her. She was his property, and his alone. His beautiful work of art, and he would not allow so many hours to go to waste just because she had a sudden change of heart.

His free hand ran freely upon her stomach now, reaching up to the height of her bosom. A finger tugged at the cleavage of her shirt for a moment before continuing its journey up, touching her neck before cupping her chin. "Beg more." He stated, breathing heavy on her flesh, smelling of tobacco and fire whiskey. "Do you remember the time we met when I was waiting for the train in Hogsmeade?" The memory was all but forgotten, and it had been a well-kept secret on his behalf. He knew Bellatrix was well aware of his nocturnal routines, the frequent visits to other women's bed. It was a right vendetta, the proper payback for being left as a mockery before the eyes of many. Inwardly, he loathed the idea of having his wife, a woman he neither loved nor hated, be so fervently devoted to someone that was not him. He wanted to pay her with the exact same currency: make it obvious her spite was reciprocal, that his fidelity and loyalty to their marriage were elsewhere.

So brittle, so tempted, he had seen Alecto at first. She was, perhaps, Amycus' one weakness. Everything had factored in his decision of approaching her, of seeing what the one female descendant of one of the noblest pureblood families was capable of doing. They were all doomed to follow the same path, reluctantly or not. But he had been allured with the thought, the possibility, of being the one person to break her. To shatter all the silly, little dreams girls her age took to weaving. He wanted her to embrace a darkness he knew that resided in her, perhaps currently overshadowed by the influence of the Black boy.

"I know what's happening to you, Alecto." After the long silence he spoke again, not moving his finger away. "You are confused. You have been with him too long. But you must remember he's made you his own little charity project. He's just trying to prove himself something that is not. All this time you have been with him, he's thought you are not like us, because he refuses to think he'd be attracted like someone like you. He refuses to think he's stupid enough to be so easily fooled like he was. Do you want to leave with that all your life, Alecto? Or would you rather say yes and let me take over what we started many years ago?"

Alecto let out a small cry when he tugged harder on her hair. She opened her eyes once more to look up into the face that was obviously more angry with her. How could she have let it come to this? To go from once childhood friends, to this tension and almost bitterness that was now between them. She had let the one thing that she promised herself she would not do, happen. She let her emotions rule her. She had never let herself show it at much as she was now. She needed to find that self within her, and shut them off. For far too long, she had been letting her feelings for both Sirius and Rodolphus cloud her judgment. As well as her feelings about everything else, something she has never done.

Before she realized it, he did something she had not expected. She felt his other hand start to roam over her stomach and up her chest. As much as his touch pleasured her, she began to seethe on the inside. She felt as if things were about to turn in a whole new direction, and she was not about to play. When his hand finally reached her chin and cupped it, he told her to beg some more, but she replied with by tighten her jaw. He was so close now, she could feel his breath and the smell of his cigars that she had come to enjoy smelling on him. Her breathing quicken to his next question.

"Do you remember the time we met when I was waiting for the train in Hogsmeade?"

She did not answer the question, he knew that she remembered. How could she have forgotten? She had come so close to doing something she knew she was not ready for. She remembered his touch, his words, his very presence. She had started something that she was unable to follow through with. To him, she had assumed that he had only thought of it as a game. For her, he was always the one thing she always wanted, but could never have. She always had to fight her emotions when it came to him, for she was afraid of losing herself. She always knew she had much to learn and growing to do, before she could ever be with a man like him. At present, and ever since getting involved with Sirius, she could be easily hurt, even though she did her best not to show it. To be with him, you had to be completely opposite, or he would want nothing to do with you, unless it was to feed off your pain for pleasure.

He continued on after a silent moment of intense starting at one another. What he said to her bothered her. She confused about many things, and she knew it, but she was no ones ‘little charity project’. She knew that he truly cared for her, but in the end, she knew it would not matter. Even if she did run, she would never stay with him. They were always doomed from the very start. She could never love him the way he wanted her too. She had already given her heart away a long time ago with even realizing it. Her eyes turned to anger and she glared deep into his.

“Let me go.” She implied sternly, behind clinched teeth. “I am nobodies little project. Not his and certainly…..not yours. Now, let me go. I have business to handle.” She did not know where the fight in her came from, but nonetheless, she showed her fire, even if it was just a spark.